Resilience is the ability to cope well with life’s challenges. This doesn’t mean side-stepping any obstacle in your life! Being resilient means having the ability to get through a particular challenge or overcome an obstacle with your confidence intact.
How do you become more resilient?
The first step is to really understand who you are as a person. A great way to get right down to the core of what is important and worthwhile to you is by identifying and living by your values.
When we’re talking psychology and personal development , your values are words to describe groups of activities that improve your overall sense of purpose and wellbeing in the world. Something you value is a reason to get out of bed in the morning. Knowing your values allows you to live with more intent, according to what makes you feel most fulfilled. You might even find that life can feel good, but strangely empty, when everything is “going well” BUT your actions aren’t quite aligned with your values.
Some examples of values that might apply to you are:
- In relationships/friendships: Loyalty, honesty, openness, generosity
- Personal/Mental characteristics: Spontaneity, creativity, playfulness, or enthusiasm
- Physical ideals: Endurance, strength, sensuality
- Career: Consistency, reliability, or attention to detail
So have a think about what’s truly important to you. Make a list of 5-10 values that you feel are important in your life and give you a sense of purpose. Once you’ve identified your values, you can apply these into your day-to-day actions. Are you implementing these values, and living a life that is truly purposeful and intentional? Are you measuring your self-worth based on YOUR values and what’s important to you, or are you basing your worth on other people’s standards?
When you use your personal values as your measuring stick, only YOU get to decide whether you’ve done a good enough job. This is much safer than letting your achievements in the world, or other people’s opinions or standards, make the decision about whether you’re good enough. With values, it all comes down to YOU deciding the kind of person is good enough, and then acting accordingly.
Values create a focus for your life in uncertain and difficult times (hello, COVID!) because each new moment then becomes an opportunity to live your values (or to forget to!). There will always be room for improvement, always be challenges (aka problems!) to give you opportunities to live by your values and be resilient. This gives us control, something we crave in chaos. In a values-based model, you can say you’ve successfully handled a problem if you make a decision about what to do based on your values, instead of acting out of fear, external pressure, or succumbing to just reacting to the circumstances.
Values-focused living helps you be more resilient by:
Feeling confident that you’ve made the right decision
Taking action that you’ll be happy with when a problem arises
Feeling more certain during uncertain times
Believing in your abilities when they reflect your core values
Embracing change and being more flexible and open to new opportunities to act on your values
Establishing goals that align with your values
Understanding your strengths
Having a greater sense of purpose and direction
Overcoming limiting beliefs by applying your values instead of acting according to others’.
Do you know what your values are, and how to use them to face your challenges in the most resilient way? If you’re at all uncertain as to what your values are, and how to use them to build resilience, master your challenges and show up as the most confident, present and attractive version of yourself, then let us help you.
Sage & Sound therapists specialise in helping you find and live by your values, with a whole lot of tools, techniques and strategies to blast through any limiting beliefs, unhelpful habits or the fears/doubts/overwhelm that can hold you back. CLICK HERE TO BOOK NOW!
